If It’s For You, It’s Yours


One of my mantras when I was in show biz was, “if it’s for me, it’s mine, I don’t care who comes into the room.” During that time, I always ran into folks who were so paranoid if there were others at an audition who were their “type” (a term used meaning a person having the same “look” as another). They’d say stuff like, “oh I’m probably not going to get this gig because Lisa’s here and she always gets cast over me, she has the ‘perfect’ body.”  (You know what I say about perfection right? If not you can read about that here. Or you can listen here).

I wrote a post called No Regrets, When Things Are Not Meant To Be, which talks about not looking back or regretting things that happened in the past. This post reiterates that ’cause it can not be said enough that what is for you is yours. Anything else was not for you in the first place so there’s no need to regret not getting it.

We each are on a Journey that includes deep learning in this, The Earth School. Some of those lessons come in not getting some of the things we want. Some lessons come in getting some things we want especially if we are Aware of how our Thoughts helped to make those things Manifest into our air space.


If It’s For You, It Doesn’t Matter What The Obstacles Are


When I was in high school and it was time to look at colleges, by that point, I had made up my mind to pursue dance as a career and had my heart set on Bennington College in Vermont. I had overcome the deficit I created in the 10th grade when I failed most of my classes due to non-attendance, making up the grades by going to summer school two years in a row.

So now, my grades are stellar and I hoped to be able to apply for a scholarship as we were dirt poor. I get all the necessary papers to apply (this was LONG before the days of everything being online) and guess what? My father won’t sign any of the papers.

That’s right. I said, my father wouldn’t sign any of the papers to apply for a scholarship. The conversations went like this:

Me: “daddy please sign these papers so I can apply for college.”

Him: “these are financial aid papers. I will not ask for a hand-out. You have to get a scholarship”

(I told you we were dirt poor so this guy was too proud to apply for financial aid????) I would write the college requesting scholarship info but they said the way to be considered for a scholarship was after filling out the financial aid papers.

I would go back and tell him this but his stance was the same. So my dream of possibly going to Bennington to pursue a dance career went up in smoke.


But Remember I Said That What is For You is Yours?


As a result of my dad’s actions or lack there of, I got into no school and what would’ve been my first semester in college was spent at home babysitting for two women on my block and working at a day care center. I really didn’t see any kind of future let alone one in the dance world.

Then one day I get a phone call from an old friend who was attending City College in New York City. I recount this story in my post about this dear friend. She urged me to reach out to the college as they were having open enrollment for the spring semester. As I told you, we had no money but at the time, it was $78 dollars. Yes I said $78 to get in. Granted, that was still a lot of money at that time.

When I was seventeen, I found out that my dad & step-mother had been taking money that had been coming to me (with Daddy as guardian) since I was nine years old. They had been paying rent with my money for eight years and I knew nothing about it. The money was from my deceased mother’s social security benefits that was for her children.

The reason I found out was due to the receipt of a letter informing me that for the money to continue to come until I was twenty-two, I had to be in college or it would be cut off when I turned eighteen. 

(The secret was out. I have always had a problem with keeping secrets, I feel they always come out and somebody always gets hurt).


A Change Is Gonna Come (and Daddy Couldn’t Stop It)


I was summoned to the Social Security office. I remember so clearly the woman asking me if I wanted the future checks to come in my name and when I replied in surprise she said, “well, it is your money anyway.” I decided to have the checks come in my name.

But that decision was hell to pay when I got home. My step mother made me feel like I had done something wrong and had me sign the checks over to them for the next 3 1/2 years. BUT.

Try as they may, they couldn’t stop what was coming to and for me. Including me finally getting away from them (that was some high drama and tragic but for another post in the future).


Not Out of The Woods Just Yet…


I got an audition to the dance department. But knew absolutely nothing about ballet. When the instructor started class, she said, “to the bar…” I PANICKED. “Do they drink before the audition, I don’t drink! What should I do???” I observed the other attendees, they walked over to wooden beams attached to the walls. I quickly learned it wasn’t ‘to the bar but to the barre! The ballet barre.

I bombed out at the audition. I had limited dance training and knew little to nothing about anything. I knew none of the terms or the moves and followed everyone in front of me. When we were in the center floor I knew nothing. Luckily at the end, I had to present a dance which I choreographed. I had put every single jump in it that I could do lol. Jumping was my forte and I made sure to highlight that.

I don’t know how much later, but I get a confusing letter from the school. It was for regular registration, not for the dance department. I was crushed.


What Is For You Is Yours No Matter What


I reported and signed up for all the academic classes they threw at me. When I told them I had auditioned for the dance program and could they find out what happened, that request was dismissed. “Don’t worry about that,” I was told. 

Not one to give up, after registration was complete I was about to go out the door. As I was about to enter the stairwell, I got an impulse to walk up the steps to my right and wandered down the hall. Lo and behold, I see a sign on my left that said, ‘Theater Department Chair, and went into the door. (always always ALWAYS Trust Your Intuition!)

There was a kind looking gentleman sitting at the desk, “hello, my name is Jacquelyn Thomas and…” before I could finish my sentence he jumped up and said, “we’ve been looking for you.” I told him about being registered for all these classes and he took the paper, tore it up and proceeded to give me my dance classes and registered me into the department.


The Rest, Is My History…


No matter where you are right now, if you’re stuck in a rut or things are not up to your liking, remember that what is for You, is YOURS. No matter what. Even after that rocky start with college, staring late in dance at age fifteen when most dancers start at two or three, none of those obstacles or what could be viewed as ‘shortcomings’ mattered. I had a clear vision in my mind of earning a living as a professional dancer.

And I did just that, dancing at first with the modern dance company Alpha Omega, attending The American Dance Machine studying with the founder herself Lee Theodore. Then I made the shift to what was then Jo Jo’s Dance Factory learning, being mentored by and teaching for the jazz legend Frank Hatchett

Before Jacquie Bird, Spiritual Wellness, there was Jacquie Bird the triple threat–the dancer/singer/actress who performed on Broadway, stage, TV and Film (School Daze anyone?), traveled the world as a guest teacher and choreographer. Taught at universities here in the U.S.

I have also been a choreographer throughout my life and continue to do so, and remember I said what is meant for you is yours? (you’re like ok Bird, you’ve said it repeatedly, and I say, it never gets old y’all ’cause we forget!)


And Then…She Wins An EMMY!


Jacquie Bird wins an Emmy Award from her choreographic work with The Young People's Chorus of NYC


National Academy of Television Arts & Sciences New York Chapter


Jacquelyn Bird


For Contributions to the Emmy Award winning entry


ALL ARTS/Young People’s Chorus of NYC’s Topsy Turvy NYC

THE WNET GROUP December 20, 2022 New York Emmy Awards

So Daddy and my mean ol’ step mom ain’t stop NOTHIN’ ’cause it was meant for me to follow this path and receive the Blessings along it. It was already mine ’cause it was meant for me. You too have many Blessings along Your Path, set Your Eye and Mindset to raising Your Vibe and honing them to Receive.


Holla back, I welcome your mindful comments and thoughts.



from Jacquie Bird, Spiritual Wellness:

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One response to “If It’s For You, It’s Yours”

  1. O. Jolly says:

    This is such an inspirational and beautiful story. Thank you sharing for the sad parts and the fabulous. And congratulations!!

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