The Six Best Gifts To Give Yourself Anytime…And They’re FREE!
Goodness knows we can be our own worst nightmares, the constant poppin’ off of our fears and our critical judgmental minds that never stop chattering can truly drive us in torment. The Buddhists call it the Monkey Mind. Our thoughts at rapid speeds jump from synapse to synapse often crashing at rest stops where we can’t shut them off when we want to sleep or meditate. We want Peace so badly and and think a vacation is what we need. Sure we do, that vacation is wonderful but since we spend more time NOT on vacation, that means all that Monkey Mind activity takes a toll on us physically, mentally and Spriritually.
TRULY, the way to Creating Peace within Your Mental Space is in recognizing the Mind Wars we assault ourselves with complete with guerilla fighters like the voice of your mother or father, your boss, the media, etc. we are constantly under a barrage of judgments, dressing downs, belittlings and insults—how many of us casually call ourselves stupid or a brand new fool? That’s not a very nice thing to say, yet we do it constantly, habitually—we don’t even realize the siege and that we are both own jailers and captives. Being unaware, our thoughts become things that just float between the synapses hurtling us around like we’re in a boat during a storm with a dead engine and our moods go up and down riddled with stress and anxiety sometimes to the point of depression.
But all is not lost...the good news is that wherever you sit on the spectrum, there are Six Gifts to bestow upon yourself to connect to Inner Peace in the midst of Life’s Journey:
“Is it for ME???? You shouldn’t have!!
Ahhhhh yes you most certainly should! Gift yourself!!
1) Tell Yourself To “Go To Your Room!” (the room I am referring to is the one in your head where there is a quiet place amidst all the buzzing of The Thinking Mind). Give yourself ‘Time Outs’ periodically, step away from your desk, go someplace you can grab a moment to take that Time Out. Close your eyes to rest them, cup your hands over them to temporarily block out the glare of the florescent lights and take a deep toke on some air through your nose then exhale slowly through the nose. Take another hit of air slowly, exhale slower. Repeat if you have the time. Remove your hands, give ‘em a shake and you’re ready to slay again! Repeat throughout your day, a little goes a long way.
Can’t get away? Be creative and make it happen! People may stare at you and think you’re crazy? So enlist some folks to join you, start a movement! Ain’t got that kinda job? I have the same answer—be creative and make it happen! Really worried about what people may think? Which brings me to that adage that..
2) What Other People Think About You Ain’t Ya Business So Stop Worrying About It—the more you can get to a place where you are not a feather for every breeze that blows, (as a friend used to say) in other words make YOUR opinion about what you think and do the priority, you’re the only person who can do YOU. When you free yourself from what friends, family and strangers may or may not think about what you should or shouldn’t do, you enable yourself to have a personal connection to…YOU. I remember when my dad died, hearing my step-mom say she didn’t even know what type of fish she liked because it was always about what my dad wanted blew me A-WAY, I mean after all those years, 40! Now she’s exploring and making up her own damn mind about stuff. Holding oneself in the cage of another’s opinion even if it is your partner’s, is confining who you are into somebody else’s notion of who you are and what’s good for you. And if they’re doing that to you, chances are they are clueless as to what is best for them.
SO DO YOU. CONNECT TO YOUR INTUITION AND FLY
3) Saying Yes Does Not Mean No—NO MEANS NO. Saying yes when you mean no gets you into soooooooooo much trouble and aggravation it isn’t worth it! I hear people, women especially, say things like, ‘I really didn’t want to, but even though it was inconvenient I said yes and it turned out to be a nightmare’ or ‘I hate doing things for her/him, she/he takes advantage of me alllllllll the friggin’ time like I don’t have anything else to do but I feel like I have to say yes!’
Um…no you don’t.
Those of you who are adverse to saying no or think you can’t, practice right now—form the only syllable of the word (or for affect, add another syllable so you get, NO-WAH!) in which you will feel your jaw drop and your lips form that sweet little syllable with the resounding sound and let ‘er rip! Envision that person in front of you asking to do so and so, really see them in front of you. Inhale here we go, say in 1, 2, 3 NO! Feel the satisfaction of being able to not do whatever that person asked, take in how that would make you feel.
See, that wasn’t so bad. Now do it in real life the next time Mr. or Ms. Take Advantage comes around, asks you to do something you don’t want to do and they give you that pleading look. Say NO. Then stick to it. They may try to impose their opinion on you, your critical voices will try to dis you to make you feel bad but don’t give them a room in your mental space! Follow the latter part of Gift #2 (stop worrying about what other people think) and keep on keepin’ on. You’ll thank yourself profusely.
And remember: you have every right to act on your own behalf,
to act in your own best interests.
Saying no when that’s what you mean will set You Free
4) Exercise Appreciation—becoming more appreciative every day is one of the most Soul-stirring things you can do and boy does it lift your mood, your Vibe, your OUTLOOK. The more you recognize and look for things to appreciate, things begin to shift in your Life—solutions appear that seemed to elude you, people come seemingly out of nowhere to assist you, doors open and your way of looking at things shift, for you cannot be Positive while focusing on the negative. They are two completely different frequencies. The Positive Frequencies come over the airwaves clear and crisp, while the negative frequencies flood the airwaves with mucho static and distortion.
And while I’m at it, remember to say nice things about yourself to yourself.
Appreciate YOU, Your Body, Your Life, FOR IT IS A GIFT!
5) Be More PRESENT—Pay ATTENTION. Actually be in the room with yourself as you engage in activity. Not the same room as you sent yourself to for your Time Out, but have your MIND in the same place as your body.
*Really Listen when someone is talking to you, go have dinner with friends
and family without being on your phone*
*DRIVE, not text or have the phone in your hands*
*See others and yourself and your relationship to others, we all share this Earth, Be Mindful when you walk anywhere, move to the side when people are trying to pass, don’t hog the walkway, hold the door, don’t let it slam in another’s face,
say Thank You to show your Appreciation*
*Hear the birds, See the sun set or rise, Feel the breeze, Smell the flowers*
BE an ACTIVE participant in Your Life, don’t just ‘phone it in’ and you won’t feel like Life is too short. Show up for every moment. Even the painful ones. All experiences contribute to the fabric in the evolving You, whether you can see them as they occur or not. Becoming more Present deepens your connection to The Whole of which you are a part.
BECOME PRESENT MORE OFTEN AND ENGAGE MORE FULLY IN YOUR LIFE
6) Begin or Deepen A Meditation Practice—I know I know, you’ve tried to meditate but it hasn’t worked for you because you fail horribly at it. If that practice eludes you, consider guided meditation to help you get going. It’s like an express train with food service taking you directly to Calmer, Grounded and Balanced—provided you employ the Gift of #5, Being Present. We are sooooooo busy doing, thinking and entertaining our chatterbox minds that being still for five minutes can serve as a respite, a pause button, a direct line to our Deeper, Knowing Selves. And that’s where Peace lives.
Slowing down momentarily allows our overworked adrenal glands a moment to chill, our blood pressure to lower, our jaws to unclench. There are many resources out there, you owe it to yourself to Gift yourself with oodles and oodles of presents to Connect to Your Inner Peace and Well-Being.